I Love Saying No, and So Can You!
I LOVE saying, “No.”
Absolutely love it. Why do people have such a hard time saying No?
In a world of precious space and time, why can’t we say no, when no allows us freedom from things we probably don’t need. Why do people experience the pressure of saying, “Yes.”
“Yes,” can really suck.
Saying yes creates excess. Saying yes creates false hopes. Saying yes creates unreal expectations. Saying no allows you to surprise. Saying no gives you control on whether you eventually do want to show up. Saying no places sole responsibility on yourself, and leaves anybody else’s contingency out of the equation. When you say, “Yes”, you not only place a sense of responsibility on yourself, you also create an expectation in the other person’s mind. Now this person may pursue extra resources or tasks to make accommodations for you. How crappy would it be if you had to bail?
Saying No more often than saying Yes teaches priorities and also teaches minimal need. It teaches you to be less needy. It teaches you to appreciate the few things you participate in and the few things you have.
Saying No creates clarity in your life. It opens space for you to be truly present in the things you are involved in, the people you have in your life, the moments you encounter.
Saying No makes you healthier. You reject excessive consumption, whether with things you eat, or things you watch. It allows you to savor the times you have food, and the times you are able to read a book, or view a show.
Saying No makes you happier. Happiness comes from the joyous reaction you get from successfully connecting with a moment in space. Saturating this space with Yes’s dilutes the power and potential of connecting with those moments.
Why do people feel so inclined to say, “Yes”? Why do people avoid saying, “No”. The 21st Century disease of FOMO come to mind. They NEED to see what happens. They can’t resist the reveal. Not being part of the ‘In’ crowd terrifies them. Possible social ramifications or punishment? They might be ridiculed. They want to gain something. They want to win.
“Yes” creates a cycle and ability to consume. The more yes, the more you consume. Yes doesn’t necessarily result in nourishment or creation. Yes opens floodgates. Yes starts war. Yes permits executions. Yes begins a drug binge. Yes creates massacres.
“No” creates balance. No enables health. No opens your mind to other things. No makes you appreciate what you have. No keeps you from harm. No protects you from danger. No saves others from grief. No sets clear expectations. No allows others to seek elsewhere. No makes you focus. No teaches discipline. No teaches priorities. No enhances the experiences you will take part in. No sets you free. No makes Yes more powerful.
How can you practice saying “No” more often?
How do we make No positive again? Yes has positive qualities, but has become negative from excessive misuse.
Yes and No are so powerful. They literally serve as gateways to decisions. Yes and No triggers chains of events that can lead to god knows what.
It’s a matter of being truly conscious and aware of where the chain of events lead, and have a clear mind when making the decision.
Every decision has a root of Yes and No. Everything in life was created from Yes and No. Without the balance, there wouldn’t be life. With too much of one or the other, overload and destruction happens. The 21st century has created way too much Yes. We need to bring No back.